Chosen Names

[Trinity]

Jul 6, 2018 5:49:05 GMT 8 Yuki said:

Jul 6, 2018 3:57:04 GMT 8 Leena said:

Might like the Paulie spelling better, even if it's more masculine. Thinking about using a more feminine middle name to balance it out.

Thinking Paulie Jade...

I like Paulie Jade, it flows really well

So do I, and its really cool as a nonbinary trans woman's name.

Names are so important.

[Yuki]

I'm considering changing my middle name too, now.

I wasn't going to originally... but my main reason why was because I figured it would upset my mom less if I kept one name. lol. But since that doesn't matter so much now... maybe I'll pick something fun.

I guess I should decide before I do any legal name change stuff.. don't want to have to do it twice.

[Von]

I have no idea what I'd pick for a middle name. Current is Nita. Apparently it means Bear, or so my mom told me. I kinda like it but it doesn't fit.
But what the hell would go with Von? I'm thinking something more masculine or neutral, but I just don't know. Not that it matters, I don't think I'll be getting my name changed soon because money. And if I chose a masc middle name my bf would be shitting himself in fear of my magically appearing penis.

[Price]

I'm not 100% on settling permanently on being referred to as a different name; my name is unmistakably a female name, and quite a common one. In my line of work, I say my name several times a day to people on the phone, and they say it back. Annoyingly, I was named after a fictional mole (yes, the animal) rather than the dog, which was my mam's first choice. I'd much rather she stuck with the dog name "Ully" because - well, that's kind of neat.
Fortunately, my middle name (which is also my username) is pretty gender-neutral and keeps being mistaken for a surname anyway.
I've toyed with changing my name by deed to just at least include 'Ully' as well; but I've not made any movement towards it yet. :')

[Amber Marie]

Using this site as well as Facebook, I try to make sure pertinent information is posted where it belongs. Still, occasionally I loose track. When I began this journey, tiny incremental changes were the norm. I was so very unsure. At that time, I simply feminized my name a bit, from Jack (short for Jackson) to Jackie. I did that to better facilitate communication in hopes that the feminized name wouldn't be off putting to new acquaintances. It wasn't a name that rang true, but it did its job.

As I've grown, as the locked and buried bits of me have reintegrated, my sense of self has solidified to the point that I am absolutely certain of who I am. Instead of feeling like something insignificant, a bug trapped in amber, I know that I am the gem itself with all its radiating warmth. And so, as even in my dreams, I'm Amber Marie, I will forever be Amber Marie. It really started me in the best way when even my sleeping subconscious knew my name.

For work, I still have to stealth, at least to a degree. Such is the life of an accountant with her clients, but Jackson isn't me, it's just the name of the gorilla suit I have to wear. So, please, call me Amber. There's no going back and I've learned and accepted to much to be anything but myself. Besides, I suppose that I have to be myself. Everybody else is taken.

[Leena]

Oct 10, 2018 3:14:44 GMT 8 Amber Marie said:

Using this site as well as Facebook, I try to make sure pertinent information is posted where it belongs. Still, occasionally I loose track. When I began this journey, tiny incremental changes were the norm. I was so very unsure. At that time, I simply feminized my name a bit, from Jack (short for Jackson) to Jackie. I did that to better facilitate communication in hopes that the feminized name wouldn't be off putting to new acquaintances. It wasn't a name that rang true, but it did its job.

As I've grown, as the locked and buried bits of me have reintegrated, my sense of self has solidified to the point that I am absolutely certain of who I am. Instead of feeling like something insignificant, a bug trapped in amber, I know that I am the gem itself with all its radiating warmth. And so, as even in my dreams, I'm Amber Marie, I will forever be Amber Marie. It really started me in the best way when even my sleeping subconscious knew my name.

For work, I still have to stealth, at least to a degree. Such is the life of an accountant with her clients, but Jackson isn't me, it's just the name of the gorilla suit I have to wear. So, please, call me Amber. There's no going back and I've learned and accepted to much to be anything but myself. Besides, I suppose that I have to be myself. Everybody else is taken.

It's wonderful you found a name you like, Amber!

I'm starting to think a single name won't work for me, though it maybe could have if I had been given a unisex name to start with. I'm actually fine with Paul when I'm doing guy mode or even androgynous. I prefer Pauleena or Leena when I'm trying to do girl mode though. Paulie and PJ are fine also no matter how I'm presenting.

I personally don't like asking people to call me anything really, I somehow had people calling me Pauleena on my first job and I secretly liked it then...

[Iona]

I found names difficult to deal with. My given name has had so much mileage it feels hard to escape. But it's always felt clunky and definitively male, if not especially 'masculine'. And the only obvious shortened version sounds completely indistinguishable from the default male name.

I picked Jos (and Josie, when I felt like something sounding daringly more feminine) just to get started here, and see what it felt like. It never felt quite right, never quite honest.

Ideally I want to find something that could arguably be a shortening of my given name, something that fits, something that I could be called, that at least gives room for ambiguity. Something that feels like me. I might have it, but I'm not sure how to try it on for size.

[Leena]

Dec 18, 2019 3:28:26 GMT 8 Iona said:

I found names difficult to deal with. My given name has had so much mileage it feels hard to escape. But it's always felt clunky and definitively male, if not especially 'masculine'. And the only obvious shortened version sounds completely indistinguishable from the default male name.

I picked Jos (and Josie, when I felt like something sounding daringly more feminine) just to get started here, and see what it felt like. It never felt quite right, never quite honest.

Ideally I want to find something that could arguably be a shortening of my given name, something that fits, something that I could be called, that at least gives room for ambiguity. Something that feels like me. I might have it, but I'm not sure how to try it on for size.

Well Jos, as you can see from my posts in this thread, it's been hard for me to deal with too.

As far as trying it on for size, just start using it when people ask your name. I haven't been particularly good at this so far, but it's weird how I forget how I'm presenting a lot of the time when I'm not actively trying to pass. I'm still OK with Paul when I'm not clean shaven and am mostly wearing clothes from the men's department, or at least I don't want to go by Leena when I look like that. Hopefully those days are numbered, but realistically I'll probably have to do that from time to time for at least the next year.

[Trinity]

Dec 18, 2019 3:28:26 GMT 8 Iona said:

I found names difficult to deal with. My given name has had so much mileage it feels hard to escape. But it's always felt clunky and definitively male, if not especially 'masculine'. And the only obvious shortened version sounds completely indistinguishable from the default male name.

I picked Jos (and Josie, when I felt like something sounding daringly more feminine) just to get started here, and see what it felt like. It never felt quite right, never quite honest.

Ideally I want to find something that could arguably be a shortening of my given name, something that fits, something that I could be called, that at least gives room for ambiguity. Something that feels like me. I might have it, but I'm not sure how to try it on for size.

Josie.  What a cool NB type name.

The outlaw Josie Wales.  And Josie and the pussycats.

I can dig it.  But when the name is right, you'll get the fit.

My name in the past in another place was Satinjoy.  It became Trinity Satin Joy when I accepted who I really am, and I kept my IRL name which is Perry, usually gendered male but its also for women, and TSJ became rather famous in certain circles in NY that matter a lot to us in theater.

Funny though, Satinjoy still feels like me, for real, and I percieve that to be non gendered as well.  SJ some still call me.

Names are funny things, I never felt the need to change mine legally, the only place I changed anything was the health insurance company, from male to female.  Because medically I believe that is true....in a nonbinary way there as well, but at a cellular level, its true for 98% of this body.

[Iona]

I've been going back and forth and all over the place on names. My given name doesn't really feel right, but I'm not sure letting go of it does either.

And Jos(ie) still doesnt feel right either.

So I've been looking at my given name and focusing on bits of it I've ignored. I've always used the first bit of it: Jon. But instead I've been looking at the end of it: Han.

So I've mulled the name Hannah over, to see how it fits. And I like the feel and the sound of it, so if it's ok with you all I might give it a trial run here.

But I'm going to go with an alternate spelling involving less change or addition to my given name.

Hana.

How does that sound to people?

[Leena]

Apr 15, 2020 7:09:58 GMT 8 Iona said:

I've been going back and forth and all over the place on names. My given name doesn't really feel right, but I'm not sure letting go of it does either.

And Jos(ie) still doesnt feel right either.

So I've been looking at my given name and focusing on bits of it I've ignored. I've always used the first bit of it: Jon. But instead I've been looking at the end of it: Han.

So I've mulled the name Hannah over, to see how it fits. And I like the feel and the sound of it, so if it's ok with you all I might give it a trial run here.

But I'm going to go with an alternate spelling involving less change or addition to my given name.

Hana.

How does that sound to people?

Sounds fine to me, Hana. But how it sounds to you matters much more. I'm glad I'm not the only one that wants a connection to their given name, it seems pretty uncommon in a lot of trans and non-binary spaces.

[Iona]

Apr 15, 2020 7:42:44 GMT 8 Leena said:

Sounds fine to me, Hana. But how it sounds to you matters much more. I'm glad I'm not the only one that wants a connection to their given name, it seems pretty uncommon in a lot of trans and non-binary space.

Thanks, Leena. And quite so, how it sounds to me is important!

Yes, I still have a rather mixed relationship with my given name, but for now - in this form at least - I feel far more at ease with it.

[Trinity]

Apr 15, 2020 7:09:58 GMT 8 Iona said:

I've been going back and forth and all over the place on names. My given name doesn't really feel right, but I'm not sure letting go of it does either.

And Jos(ie) still doesnt feel right either.

So I've been looking at my given name and focusing on bits of it I've ignored. I've always used the first bit of it: Jon. But instead I've been looking at the end of it: Han.

So I've mulled the name Hannah over, to see how it fits. And I like the feel and the sound of it, so if it's ok with you all I might give it a trial run here.

But I'm going to go with an alternate spelling involving less change or addition to my given name.

Hana.

How does that sound to people?

Whatever sounds good and true to you is good Hana.

I think its cool.

[Yuki]

Apr 15, 2020 7:09:58 GMT 8 Iona said:

I've been going back and forth and all over the place on names. My given name doesn't really feel right, but I'm not sure letting go of it does either.

And Jos(ie) still doesnt feel right either.

So I've been looking at my given name and focusing on bits of it I've ignored. I've always used the first bit of it: Jon. But instead I've been looking at the end of it: Han.

So I've mulled the name Hannah over, to see how it fits. And I like the feel and the sound of it, so if it's ok with you all I might give it a trial run here.

But I'm going to go with an alternate spelling involving less change or addition to my given name.

Hana.

How does that sound to people?

I changed names a few times and tested them all out on here first. Try as many as you want to or need to.

Hana is a nice name

[Iona]

My wife has really sweetly taken to calling me Josie from time to time. Which is lovely, but it confirms that it doesn't feel right. Now I'm having trouble introducing the name Hana to her...