inherit
4
0
Jul 11, 2019 20:09:26 GMT 8
1,471
Taka
1,648
Nov 18, 2014 3:23:40 GMT 8
November 2014
taka
sooty
he and they work best
rather fluid
|
Post by Taka on Feb 23, 2015 5:58:36 GMT 8
oh, i'm really surprised to hear that cis women know how to be a woman...
someone mentioned once how on some forums, the mtf don't want the ftm folks to visit their sections. because who knows best what it really means to be a woman? women just love to tell other women how to be a good woman. a nightmare to grow up in as ftm. if you want certain types of advice, it's actually much closer than many seem willing to believe.
|
|
inherit
32
0
Jun 24, 2015 3:12:57 GMT 8
419
Edge
517
Nov 26, 2014 22:03:42 GMT 8
November 2014
edge
FTM Non-Binary
Genderfluid
He/His/Him
|
Post by Edge on Feb 23, 2015 6:39:33 GMT 8
They visited our section of the forum... It usually wasn't a problem, but it was kind of awkward when they'd post on our threads about how testosterone was for them when it's the opposite for us. I mean no offence to anyone, but advice on how to be a woman (or any gender) seems really off and awkward to me. What advice can there really be anyway other than be the woman (or whatever gender) you are?
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
Deleted
inherit
guest@proboards.com
3
0
Jun 27, 2024 3:43:39 GMT 8
Deleted
0
Jun 27, 2024 3:43:39 GMT 8
January 1970
Deleted
|
Post by Deleted on Feb 23, 2015 8:01:30 GMT 8
They visited our section of the forum... It usually wasn't a problem, but it was kind of awkward when they'd post on our threads about how testosterone was for them when it's the opposite for us. I mean no offence to anyone, but advice on how to be a woman (or any gender) seems really off and awkward to me. What advice can there really be anyway other than be the woman (or whatever gender) you are? Just being real and who you want to be rather than trying to model yourself after what you think you should be based on someone else's ideas or self image. Just be an individual and a genuine article rather then a caricature of someone else.
|
|
Emily
Junior Member
Posts: 71
inherit
64
0
Jun 11, 2015 3:21:46 GMT 8
61
Emily
71
Jan 15, 2015 18:21:48 GMT 8
January 2015
emily
|
Post by Emily on Feb 23, 2015 15:23:55 GMT 8
oh, i'm really surprised to hear that cis women know how to be a woman... someone mentioned once how on some forums, the mtf don't want the ftm folks to visit their sections. because who knows best what it really means to be a woman? women just love to tell other women how to be a good woman. a nightmare to grow up in as ftm. if you want certain types of advice, it's actually much closer than many seem willing to believe. I guess it is the same for guys as well, plus it is not only telling but also showing or "resorting to physical" when refusing to conform.
|
|
inherit
4
0
Jul 11, 2019 20:09:26 GMT 8
1,471
Taka
1,648
Nov 18, 2014 3:23:40 GMT 8
November 2014
taka
sooty
he and they work best
rather fluid
|
Post by Taka on Feb 23, 2015 16:45:28 GMT 8
i was possibly writing it backwards. there are sides of female and male society that anyone who's grown up in would know. if all the mtf transsexuals tell a girl that her style is wrong, try asking an ftm about it. there aren't too many myths about a gender in a group of people who are running away from it.
i also find it interesting how mtf people discuss female puberty, like breast growth. most trans men may not like to talk about it, but they've all experienced it.
we have some treasure chests of experience. it seems really odd that so many don't use them. and equally odd that the only thing trans girls do around trans men is complain about how toxic testosterone was to them. what's the point in doing that.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
Deleted
inherit
guest@proboards.com
11
0
Jun 27, 2024 3:43:39 GMT 8
Deleted
0
Jun 27, 2024 3:43:39 GMT 8
January 1970
Deleted
|
Post by Deleted on Feb 23, 2015 19:56:09 GMT 8
People wanting to control.
People driven by self.
By fear.
By hate.
Anyone have a so called normal childhood?
Why would friction exist between mtf and ftm and nb. Makes no sense to me.
Unless goal is nottto seek truth, but what you want to hear, that you do what you want, screw collateral damage, feed your craving for more...whatever.
Controllers vs truth speakers.
Not many mtf probably want to remember the puberty hell years.
As to hormones, well, of course.
T is toxic. Brain receptors. Next?
E is toxic. Ok, I wouldn't know.
We know pain, how we got there, how we got out, if we did. So we share what works.
Tell me who would know splitting for a Nb person.is a recipe for pain.
Us.
I trust the forum, hold others to our collective truth, compare them, try what seems good, tell you results transparently.
I like raw emotion, raw truth, unveiled people.
Fake is not appealing. But what is fake hiding from?
Interesting thread.
Trinity
|
|
inherit
4
0
Jul 11, 2019 20:09:26 GMT 8
1,471
Taka
1,648
Nov 18, 2014 3:23:40 GMT 8
November 2014
taka
sooty
he and they work best
rather fluid
|
Post by Taka on Feb 23, 2015 23:19:45 GMT 8
and female puberty is just as hellish to the ftm.
this still doesn't mean we can't talk about it. i don't want to be bound by the past. pretending it didn't happen, pretending to forget the emotions, and the more physical aspects, won't do me any good.
i can only be free when i can be all my past as well as who i am now. my experience is real. i don't hate it, hating it will only keep the pain right here with me.
who i am will not be defined only by my puberty either. i should be allowed to talk about all my experience, when it is relevant. that i don't mind talking about a certain part of my life shouldn't make me any less of this or that gender. trannier than thou thinking is what we get from that. and hiding things by never talking about them, only gives them power over us. kill the triggers by seeing them for what they are. you can defend yourself more easily against what you know.
now i'm writing myself off topic...
there's a way of looking for advice. sometimes it takes asking the right person. that right one isn't always someone close.
|
|
inherit
jasonmitchellemail@gmail.com
1
0
1
Dec 31, 2023 12:41:47 GMT 8
3,521
EchelonHunt
Avatar by @hitsukuya
3,193
Nov 17, 2014 22:05:35 GMT 8
November 2014
admin
|
Post by EchelonHunt on Feb 23, 2015 23:25:43 GMT 8
The funny thing about the Internet is that you don't necessarily have to ask for advice to be given advice. Some will feel the need to hammer their advice (or more like their way of living) onto you.
A MTF posted a thread about their desire to keep her flat chest since she doesn't want breasts, they don't fit her self image of a woman but she does want a vagina. She specified that she originally identified as non-binary but came to the conclusion she is much happier since identifying as female. She wasn't asking for advice about their identity as it was pretty clear she was confident in who she is.
Another fellow MTF voiced their opinion that she must be non-binary, a few others seemed to gasp in horror and struggle to understand the concept of a woman having a flat chest (never mind that there are ciswomen who are flat-chested as well...) because oh no! God forbid a MTF who does not want to fulfill a stereotype of a big-busted curvy millionaire beauty commonly seen on gossip magazines covers...!
For me, I was over the moon... well, the girl aspect of my identity certainly was. My girl aspect definitely did not want breasts because like this particular MTF, she also held a self-image of herself as a girl with a flat chest. Her "itty bitties", she'd call 'em. I reached out to her and told her I related to her... and basically to fuck what everyone else is saying. She was really nice, it's a just a crying shame that a rampage of close-minded MTFs had her shaken up and left her to defend her female identity just because it doesn't fit their norm of what being female is.
Fuck stereotypes, fuck gender roles and fuck ham-fisted advice from "trannier than thou" folks.
|
|
inherit
44
0
Oct 20, 2015 9:50:50 GMT 8
68
ThePhoenix
71
Dec 1, 2014 8:36:21 GMT 8
December 2014
thephoenix
|
Post by ThePhoenix on Feb 23, 2015 23:54:47 GMT 8
What I find about myself is that I usually relate best to cis women. Why? I guess years and years and years of having 75% of my friends belong to that group has had an effect on me. I have no idea why it started out that way in the first place because it was never a conscious thing. I just woke up one day and noticed I had basically no male friends.
The next group I feel most comfortable with is female assigned trans* people. It's unfortunate and I feel bad about that because I think the reason I like them has a lot to do with the female socialization and upbringing. They are more like what I'm used to with cis women friends. And it's the single thing many of them like least about themselves. And their reaction to me is "ewwwww a girl."
But the thing I notice is that both those two groups tend to have been affected by an awful lot of exposure to women and to being in the world as (apparent) women. I too am affected by similar, but not identical, social influences because of my tendency to form friendships almost exclusively with women and (very) rarely with men. When you spend a lot of time immersed in a group of people, it cannot help but affect you for the same reason that parents worry about their kids hanging out with kids that will be a "bad influence."
I think that the big difference I notice with mtf persons is that they don't seem to spend much time around women before transitioning except in sexually charged situations--dating, etc. EchelonHunt and Taka seem to be both getting at the fact that there are many ways to be a woman. True. There is an enormous range of possibilities in how to be a woman (or a man). But most mtf spectrum persons don't seem to be exposed to that range of possibilities because they have little real exposure to what women are really like. Even after transition, it seems like many of them stay very uncomfortable with actually being around women. To quote one trans woman that I advised to spend time around women, "but what if I'm attracted to them?"
Ftm persons seem to have a bit better exposure to men, which makes sense because if you are a woman in the world, you have to pay attention to men in ways that men don't necessarily have to pay attention to women.
Non-binary persons seem to have it even harder because it's not that they don't pay attention to role models. It's that the role models are nearly non-existent. There just isn't a socially defined non-binary role to be exposed to and learn from. It's only in a few places like this website that examples and role models are easily found. And since the entire concept is so new, those role models are themselves pioneers who are trying to figure it out.
Anyway, I do apologize. I did not intend for my one post to derail the topic and I hope this post will help put it back on track.
|
|
inherit
4
0
Jul 11, 2019 20:09:26 GMT 8
1,471
Taka
1,648
Nov 18, 2014 3:23:40 GMT 8
November 2014
taka
sooty
he and they work best
rather fluid
|
Post by Taka on Feb 24, 2015 0:18:18 GMT 8
there seems to be something weird about the nonbinary mind, phoenix. the same way as wehave troubles sticking with one single binary gender, we also have troubles sticking to a single well defined topic. but what development would the world ever habe seen if nobody dared think outside the box and redifine the topic? your thoughts are as welcome as the sun after a month long night. don't worry about derailing, that's likely to be our own fault.
that thing you say about fear of attraction is really interesting. it's almost as if they don't realize cis lesbians exist. have they been taught to be that aggressive on the dating scene that they can't even imagine just talking to someone they're attracted to?
i think i'll conclude that it's pointless to ask mtf for dating advise...
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
Deleted
inherit
guest@proboards.com
3
0
Jun 27, 2024 3:43:39 GMT 8
Deleted
0
Jun 27, 2024 3:43:39 GMT 8
January 1970
Deleted
|
Post by Deleted on Feb 24, 2015 0:54:16 GMT 8
The funny thing about the Internet is that you don't necessarily have to ask for advice to be given advice. Some will feel the need to hammer their advice (or more like their way of living) onto you.
A MTF posted a thread about their desire to keep her flat chest since she doesn't want breasts, they don't fit her self image of a woman but she does want a vagina. She specified that she originally identified as non-binary but came to the conclusion she is much happier since identifying as female. She wasn't asking for advice about their identity as it was pretty clear she was confident in who she is.
Another fellow MTF voiced their opinion that she must be non-binary, a few others seemed to gasp in horror and struggle to understand the concept of a woman having a flat chest (never mind that there are ciswomen who are flat-chested as well...) because oh no! God forbid a MTF who does not want to fulfill a stereotype of a big-busted curvy millionaire beauty commonly seen on gossip magazines covers...!
For me, I was over the moon... well, the girl aspect of my identity certainly was. My girl aspect definitely did not want breasts because like this particular MTF, she also held a self-image of herself as a girl with a flat chest. Her "itty bitties", she'd call 'em. I reached out to her and told her I related to her... and basically to fuck what everyone else is saying. She was really nice, it's a just a crying shame that a rampage of close-minded MTFs had her shaken up and left her to defend her female identity just because it doesn't fit their norm of what being female is.
Fuck stereotypes, fuck gender roles and fuck ham-fisted advice from "trannier than thou" folks.
It's always just a pisser when we are stuck on the same planet with the pin heads that you so eloquently described, I agree whole heartedly Jacey. Oddly enough many of the biggest MtF pills have the most limited of physical experiences or relationships with women ever and have not spent their lives being objectified on account of breasts, have never rolled over in bed and experienced the discomfort, and have never had them constantly in the way of what they are doing each day. It's been my own observation that people in western cultures place entirely too much stock in boobs as a necessity to be seen as either beautiful or desirous. I have always been so much more attracted to women who are intelligent and are people of substance over how they look physically.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
Deleted
inherit
guest@proboards.com
22
0
Jun 27, 2024 3:43:40 GMT 8
Deleted
0
Jun 27, 2024 3:43:40 GMT 8
January 1970
Deleted
|
Post by Deleted on Feb 24, 2015 1:19:56 GMT 8
The funny thing about the Internet is that you don't necessarily have to ask for advice to be given advice. Some will feel the need to hammer their advice (or more like their way of living) onto you.
A MTF posted a thread about their desire to keep her flat chest since she doesn't want breasts, they don't fit her self image of a woman but she does want a vagina. She specified that she originally identified as non-binary but came to the conclusion she is much happier since identifying as female. She wasn't asking for advice about their identity as it was pretty clear she was confident in who she is.
Another fellow MTF voiced their opinion that she must be non-binary, a few others seemed to gasp in horror and struggle to understand the concept of a woman having a flat chest (never mind that there are ciswomen who are flat-chested as well...) because oh no! God forbid a MTF who does not want to fulfill a stereotype of a big-busted curvy millionaire beauty commonly seen on gossip magazines covers...!
For me, I was over the moon... well, the girl aspect of my identity certainly was. My girl aspect definitely did not want breasts because like this particular MTF, she also held a self-image of herself as a girl with a flat chest. Her "itty bitties", she'd call 'em. I reached out to her and told her I related to her... and basically to fuck what everyone else is saying. She was really nice, it's a just a crying shame that a rampage of close-minded MTFs had her shaken up and left her to defend her female identity just because it doesn't fit their norm of what being female is.
Fuck stereotypes, fuck gender roles and fuck ham-fisted advice from "trannier than thou" folks.
Amen on that Jayce. I think everyone has their own ideals of what is perfect for themselves and not necessarily what is perfect for someone else. Jeeze I wouldn't mind being flat chested. Almost there as it is but sometimes they do get more in the way than anything else. When I had to be a guy and drive for a living I had to wear a bra on rough roads or the would end up really sore. I got caught once taking my bra off. Thank god the guy didn't really even seem to notice. And then driving in the summertime with leather seats and wearing a bra leaves sort of a drier outline on your back so I would have to change t shirts too. :rolleyes:So it wouldn't bother me a bit to have nothing, but I kind of like what I got but either way. Yep that about sums it up for me. I think we should all be able to go as far as we want without criticism especially those from under the same umbrella. Try to convince someone that their way is the only way, is just as bad as the other side downgrading transgender and trying to make them believe cis is the only way to go.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
Deleted
inherit
guest@proboards.com
11
0
Jun 27, 2024 3:43:39 GMT 8
Deleted
0
Jun 27, 2024 3:43:39 GMT 8
January 1970
Deleted
|
Post by Deleted on Feb 24, 2015 4:54:57 GMT 8
The funny thing about the Internet is that you don't necessarily have to ask for advice to be given advice. Some will feel the need to hammer their advice (or more like their way of living) onto you.
A MTF posted a thread about their desire to keep her flat chest since she doesn't want breasts, they don't fit her self image of a woman but she does want a vagina. She specified that she originally identified as non-binary but came to the conclusion she is much happier since identifying as female. She wasn't asking for advice about their identity as it was pretty clear she was confident in who she is.
Another fellow MTF voiced their opinion that she must be non-binary, a few others seemed to gasp in horror and struggle to understand the concept of a woman having a flat chest (never mind that there are ciswomen who are flat-chested as well...) because oh no! God forbid a MTF who does not want to fulfill a stereotype of a big-busted curvy millionaire beauty commonly seen on gossip magazines covers...!
For me, I was over the moon... well, the girl aspect of my identity certainly was. My girl aspect definitely did not want breasts because like this particular MTF, she also held a self-image of herself as a girl with a flat chest. Her "itty bitties", she'd call 'em. I reached out to her and told her I related to her... and basically to fuck what everyone else is saying. She was really nice, it's a just a crying shame that a rampage of close-minded MTFs had her shaken up and left her to defend her female identity just because it doesn't fit their norm of what being female is.
Fuck stereotypes, fuck gender roles and fuck ham-fisted advice from "trannier than thou" folks.
Amen on that Jayce. I think everyone has their own ideals of what is perfect for themselves and not necessarily what is perfect for someone else. Jeeze I wouldn't mind being flat chested. Almost there as it is but sometimes they do get more in the way than anything else. When I had to be a guy and drive for a living I had to wear a bra on rough roads or the would end up really sore. I got caught once taking my bra off. Thank god the guy didn't really even seem to notice. And then driving in the summertime with leather seats and wearing a bra leaves sort of a drier outline on your back so I would have to change t shirts too. :rolleyes:So it wouldn't bother me a bit to have nothing, but I kind of like what I got but either way. Yep that about sums it up for me. I think we should all be able to go as far as we want without criticism especially those from under the same umbrella. Try to convince someone that their way is the only way, is just as bad as the other side downgrading transgender and trying to make them believe cis is the only way to go. Lol....I want my b cups anyway, even if I agree totally! Hrt, I don't really sweat or smell. Used to be aweful. :-)
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
Deleted
inherit
guest@proboards.com
22
0
Jun 27, 2024 3:43:40 GMT 8
Deleted
0
Jun 27, 2024 3:43:40 GMT 8
January 1970
Deleted
|
Post by Deleted on Feb 24, 2015 5:14:12 GMT 8
Amen on that Jayce. I think everyone has their own ideals of what is perfect for themselves and not necessarily what is perfect for someone else. Jeeze I wouldn't mind being flat chested. Almost there as it is but sometimes they do get more in the way than anything else. When I had to be a guy and drive for a living I had to wear a bra on rough roads or the would end up really sore. I got caught once taking my bra off. Thank god the guy didn't really even seem to notice. And then driving in the summertime with leather seats and wearing a bra leaves sort of a drier outline on your back so I would have to change t shirts too. :rolleyes:So it wouldn't bother me a bit to have nothing, but I kind of like what I got but either way. Yep that about sums it up for me. I think we should all be able to go as far as we want without criticism especially those from under the same umbrella. Try to convince someone that their way is the only way, is just as bad as the other side downgrading transgender and trying to make them believe cis is the only way to go. Lol....I want my b cups anyway, even if I agree totally! Hrt, I don't really sweat or smell. Used to be aweful. :-) A lot of times that funky smell is from excess body hair. I still sweat because it is just a fact of life living in an area where the air temp is in the mid 90s with 90-100% humidity in the summertime. If I had body hair then when I used to peel my clothes off at the end of the day, UGHH. (puke) Without it I still sweat but what I smell is more of the lotion I use and deodorant. I have been told that the hair traps the sweat close to the skin and bacteria ends up breeding in that.... I can't go no more because it actually makes me sick at my stomach. I used to get bacterial infections a long time ago and a doctor sort of suggested getting rid of the body hair. It worked for me. Now no funk and I still smell good after sweating when I do. Without the hair the clothing soaks up the sweat. I don't know how accurate it is but it seems to work really well for me. The dermatologist really couldn't support it but had good results from others, so. I have been since my teens. I love my little A's. I can always use a padded bra if I want to be a little more noticeable. If not I can hide them really good.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
Deleted
inherit
guest@proboards.com
11
0
Jun 27, 2024 3:43:39 GMT 8
Deleted
0
Jun 27, 2024 3:43:39 GMT 8
January 1970
Deleted
|
Post by Deleted on Feb 24, 2015 6:32:59 GMT 8
Crap we derailed the thread talking about boobs again.
What a riot!
Now, where were we...
|
|