(TW) Eating Disorders/ recovery
Sept 16, 2017 14:16:22 GMT 8
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EchelonHunt, Ativan Prescribed, and 1 more like this
Post by Valerie on Sept 16, 2017 14:16:22 GMT 8
First off I'd like to say that I welcome everyone voicing their opinions, talking about their experiences, and in no way would I want to censor, or tell someone what to say, or not to say! I want y'all and anyone coming to this thread in future, to openly speak on their experiences, their struggle, etc. And there's been great things mentioned, and I know I haven't responded or talked much after starting this thread so I apologize!
However i need to speak up on how uncomfortable it kinda makes me in the direction this thread is going. My intention was to create a thread for those who also struggled with eating disorders (anorexia, bulimia, binge eating, etc) to come to find support, and help each other in not relapsing, or have a safe free non-judgmental place to come, and speak on struggling, or needing strength from others to not fall back on old habits, or relapse back into unhealthy tendencies that are in eating disorder areas. This should be a free space to speak out and voice concern that you need help, or reach out to others in times of struggles, or even a place for those working on recovery from eating disorder.
Now with that being said like I said I need to speak up on how really uncomfortable it is that many of you are encouraging not eating/skipping meals/ counting calories(which isn't bad in itself, but probably not best thing for someone to do who is trying to recover from eating disorder)/or even saying how it's not a bad thing with to starve yourself even for a day bc for someone who's struggled with eating disorder, or trying to refrain from listening to those thoughts & not start starving self again it's kinda really not the best thing to come to a recovery thread, and see people giving dieting tips, encouraging to refrain from eating for a day or two or three bc if you get yourself back into that mind set the relapse could be really bad, and who knows how hard it'll be to pull self back outta it!
I've been reading thread responses and cringed every time someone encouraged, or said it's okay/not gonna hurt to skip a meal bc let's be honest that's very enabling, and I know none of y'all mean it in that way, and are only trying to help, & mean well with your responses! But like I said I really don't like the direction this thread is going in so many people suggesting not eat for few days/skipping meals bc that's how it could lead someone down the path of developing an eating disorder. Like I said I know none y'all meant to be encouraging those toxic unhealthy habits/tendencies, and only mean well, but ya gotta stop and think "hey is this thing that I'm trying to say or convey gonna cause someone to relapse who's trying to recover from an eating disorder. " I also don't want this thread to be alarming, or make others who are trying to recover feel uncomfortable, or relapse from reading these responses that tell them to listen to that voice in your head that tells you not to eat. Having it encouraged from others especially trusted friends/loved ones really hurts to be honest.
Cause honestly on a daily basis I struggle with those thoughts that tell me ohh it's okays to skip a meal, it's okay you don't need to eat don't bother. Bc I know it's so unhealthy, and if I don't make sure I at least eat something for day I could very well seeing myself going 2 weeks without eating like I did 2 years ago, and idk if I'd be able to have same inner strength to pull myself outta that mindset again if I let myself get that bad again!
Update! I been doing well with making sure I'm eating everyday again! Still probably not as much as I probably should be though! I finally went to my therapist appointment (work got in way and I had to reschedule few times) and talked about my concerns with him! He told me my self awareness, and ability to realize that my habits/tendencies are unhealthy and alarming are probably what keep me right at that borderline of an eating disorder, and he complimented me on my inner strength/self awareness being a strong ability in helping me navigate these situations/circumstances/life/etc etc I'm not wording in right way he said it! We also discussed if there were any patterns, or times/circumstances that are coming up like dates/ events, or when I went to see my friends and I wanted to look good for them when they saw me as times where I starve myself more! He also voiced concern over fact that it's not very good at all if I even go a day or more without eating, but it depends on what could be effecting me in that whether it's stress/emotions, or me actually overly worrying about weight and everything I eat. We're gonna check in/keep a watch on how in doing in future sessions. It made me feel really good that I finally could have a conversation with my concerns over am I gonna relapse again, or just been blindly in denial living with an eating disorder still over years and just thought I had it under control! I tried reaching out to my close friends, but even they didn't exactly get where I was coming from and seemed to encourage the over dieting/skipping meals that I was doing as good! But also another hard annoying thing is that I can't properly discuss my concerns without people saying "you look fine and great just way you are" which yes thanks you I agree, but I still can't help the guilt I feel after eating and regretting it, and struggling with the thoughts that tell me not to eat you'll drop the weight everyday. It's almost like bc I look fine/healthy and not like someone who struggles with an ED that maybe they don't take my concerns seriously, or see what I'm doing as wrong! It's also just hard in general bc all of society (at least here in western society/ USA) has really toxic diet culture, and even encourages not eating as much. (Which I hope no thinks I'm saying over eating isn't an issue either bc it is, but in my experiences I mostly deal with struggling with trying to make sure I eat throughout day) it's just it's very hard to try and avoid toxic dieting culture, and disheartening that you can't really escape others who are encouraging same tendencies you're trying to abstain from giving into!
All I'm trying to say is if we could keep any diet tips/talk, calorie counting, encouraging people to fast for weight loss, skip meals, not eat for few days, or anything else that could be cringey and make someone who's trying to recover, and not relapse back into those habits/tendencies would be great thanks you! Especially since there ton of other threads in fitness section for conversations about dieting/other weight loss/management, and coming to thread devoted to those who are recovering, or those who are currently struggling with eating disorders is really honestly not the best thing to do, and this isn't the place for it to be honest! Which yea I understand this is all very tricky and how do you word or have conversation about this without suggesting things that could lead someone down a not so healthy path.
However i need to speak up on how uncomfortable it kinda makes me in the direction this thread is going. My intention was to create a thread for those who also struggled with eating disorders (anorexia, bulimia, binge eating, etc) to come to find support, and help each other in not relapsing, or have a safe free non-judgmental place to come, and speak on struggling, or needing strength from others to not fall back on old habits, or relapse back into unhealthy tendencies that are in eating disorder areas. This should be a free space to speak out and voice concern that you need help, or reach out to others in times of struggles, or even a place for those working on recovery from eating disorder.
Now with that being said like I said I need to speak up on how really uncomfortable it is that many of you are encouraging not eating/skipping meals/ counting calories(which isn't bad in itself, but probably not best thing for someone to do who is trying to recover from eating disorder)/or even saying how it's not a bad thing with to starve yourself even for a day bc for someone who's struggled with eating disorder, or trying to refrain from listening to those thoughts & not start starving self again it's kinda really not the best thing to come to a recovery thread, and see people giving dieting tips, encouraging to refrain from eating for a day or two or three bc if you get yourself back into that mind set the relapse could be really bad, and who knows how hard it'll be to pull self back outta it!
I've been reading thread responses and cringed every time someone encouraged, or said it's okay/not gonna hurt to skip a meal bc let's be honest that's very enabling, and I know none of y'all mean it in that way, and are only trying to help, & mean well with your responses! But like I said I really don't like the direction this thread is going in so many people suggesting not eat for few days/skipping meals bc that's how it could lead someone down the path of developing an eating disorder. Like I said I know none y'all meant to be encouraging those toxic unhealthy habits/tendencies, and only mean well, but ya gotta stop and think "hey is this thing that I'm trying to say or convey gonna cause someone to relapse who's trying to recover from an eating disorder. " I also don't want this thread to be alarming, or make others who are trying to recover feel uncomfortable, or relapse from reading these responses that tell them to listen to that voice in your head that tells you not to eat. Having it encouraged from others especially trusted friends/loved ones really hurts to be honest.
Cause honestly on a daily basis I struggle with those thoughts that tell me ohh it's okays to skip a meal, it's okay you don't need to eat don't bother. Bc I know it's so unhealthy, and if I don't make sure I at least eat something for day I could very well seeing myself going 2 weeks without eating like I did 2 years ago, and idk if I'd be able to have same inner strength to pull myself outta that mindset again if I let myself get that bad again!
Update! I been doing well with making sure I'm eating everyday again! Still probably not as much as I probably should be though! I finally went to my therapist appointment (work got in way and I had to reschedule few times) and talked about my concerns with him! He told me my self awareness, and ability to realize that my habits/tendencies are unhealthy and alarming are probably what keep me right at that borderline of an eating disorder, and he complimented me on my inner strength/self awareness being a strong ability in helping me navigate these situations/circumstances/life/etc etc I'm not wording in right way he said it! We also discussed if there were any patterns, or times/circumstances that are coming up like dates/ events, or when I went to see my friends and I wanted to look good for them when they saw me as times where I starve myself more! He also voiced concern over fact that it's not very good at all if I even go a day or more without eating, but it depends on what could be effecting me in that whether it's stress/emotions, or me actually overly worrying about weight and everything I eat. We're gonna check in/keep a watch on how in doing in future sessions. It made me feel really good that I finally could have a conversation with my concerns over am I gonna relapse again, or just been blindly in denial living with an eating disorder still over years and just thought I had it under control! I tried reaching out to my close friends, but even they didn't exactly get where I was coming from and seemed to encourage the over dieting/skipping meals that I was doing as good! But also another hard annoying thing is that I can't properly discuss my concerns without people saying "you look fine and great just way you are" which yes thanks you I agree, but I still can't help the guilt I feel after eating and regretting it, and struggling with the thoughts that tell me not to eat you'll drop the weight everyday. It's almost like bc I look fine/healthy and not like someone who struggles with an ED that maybe they don't take my concerns seriously, or see what I'm doing as wrong! It's also just hard in general bc all of society (at least here in western society/ USA) has really toxic diet culture, and even encourages not eating as much. (Which I hope no thinks I'm saying over eating isn't an issue either bc it is, but in my experiences I mostly deal with struggling with trying to make sure I eat throughout day) it's just it's very hard to try and avoid toxic dieting culture, and disheartening that you can't really escape others who are encouraging same tendencies you're trying to abstain from giving into!
All I'm trying to say is if we could keep any diet tips/talk, calorie counting, encouraging people to fast for weight loss, skip meals, not eat for few days, or anything else that could be cringey and make someone who's trying to recover, and not relapse back into those habits/tendencies would be great thanks you! Especially since there ton of other threads in fitness section for conversations about dieting/other weight loss/management, and coming to thread devoted to those who are recovering, or those who are currently struggling with eating disorders is really honestly not the best thing to do, and this isn't the place for it to be honest! Which yea I understand this is all very tricky and how do you word or have conversation about this without suggesting things that could lead someone down a not so healthy path.