Post by Metamorph on Nov 21, 2014 12:26:27 GMT 8
I thought I would say hi and welcome others. Any other transmen out there are welcome to post.
I am christopher. I don't consider myself binary but identify as ftm. That may change at some point. I don't know. I'm not that worried about that. I have always to greater and lesser extents identified as male. I always resented being stuck in a female body. when I was around 11 or 12? I heard about transgender. I was so excited at first. finally that something that explained me. I said something to my mom who wasn't thrilled and commented that it was males turning into females. this was 30+ years ago so there wasn't that much info out there. And I knew I had a female aspect so for the next 30 years I pushed it out of my brain. And I had some other major issues to deal with (my family was badly nuts and unhealthy).
When I hit 40 my life was getting more stable and safe and the gender issues became more to the forefront. I began identifying as genderqueer. For a few years that calmed things down but then about a year ago, I started searching again and began seriously talking to my therapist about it. the idea of having a male (by my definition body) was such a relief. finally! so, very quickly, I began to transform. I've been on T for 6 months now and in less 3 months I will have top surgery.
So, I just said more than I expected but I finally know how to explain something I haven't been able to. I am non-binary but also identify as ftm. That's because knowing I didn't have to destroy my female aspects, is what has allowed me to take on my male identity. What's the difference between aspect and identity? Well, I'll come up with an answer to that as I continue on my journey.
I am christopher. I don't consider myself binary but identify as ftm. That may change at some point. I don't know. I'm not that worried about that. I have always to greater and lesser extents identified as male. I always resented being stuck in a female body. when I was around 11 or 12? I heard about transgender. I was so excited at first. finally that something that explained me. I said something to my mom who wasn't thrilled and commented that it was males turning into females. this was 30+ years ago so there wasn't that much info out there. And I knew I had a female aspect so for the next 30 years I pushed it out of my brain. And I had some other major issues to deal with (my family was badly nuts and unhealthy).
When I hit 40 my life was getting more stable and safe and the gender issues became more to the forefront. I began identifying as genderqueer. For a few years that calmed things down but then about a year ago, I started searching again and began seriously talking to my therapist about it. the idea of having a male (by my definition body) was such a relief. finally! so, very quickly, I began to transform. I've been on T for 6 months now and in less 3 months I will have top surgery.
So, I just said more than I expected but I finally know how to explain something I haven't been able to. I am non-binary but also identify as ftm. That's because knowing I didn't have to destroy my female aspects, is what has allowed me to take on my male identity. What's the difference between aspect and identity? Well, I'll come up with an answer to that as I continue on my journey.
How exciting! I hope your top surgery goes well and you will be more than welcome to blog your experiences in the Top Surgery thread I'll make 
