Considering coming out of retirement

[Deleted]

Well, now you've done it.

Between the news articles, the meeting face to face with those trying to survive, one of which is in screenwriting and tv production classes, and the vids that are on you tube and the amazing sequence of events that have lead up to now, I'm sitting on a fire in my heart. Whether it is sustainable or not remains to be seen. But the political performing artist has come alive with a vengeance and I just cannot stop it.

In 5 years I will retire from the mainstream, and I have every intention of lighting the world on fire for trans if I can through music. The obstacles are formidable, as are the issues that block, but as the burden grows in my spirit to do what I must do, I may have to pay that price.  Keeping part of my life stealth is also in the cards, and I need to start figuring this stuff out quick.

I am deadly serious about this, I was once one of the top tenors in NY. I got every single job I ever auditioned for until I hit broadway and the stars with name recognition got it, for the money they draw. I am still a member of Actors Equity but I never bought into the screen actors guild, and that means you tube and the independent film is wide open to us.  Ironically it was being trans that killed my career and the alcoholism that went with it, and now, it is the fuel that will ignite what was meant to be from the very beginning.

If I go after this, singing American folk and setting it to cinematic images that will tear at the hearts to put it where it is on you tube and the forum, that will change lives and perceptions.  I may do it half ass, or I may go full pro on it - including studio work.  It just depends on who I can get behind it.

This forum has some of the most talented and brilliant people in the world on it. If I go non profit, and yes I would need full artistic control and would be the artistic director, but if I did, I would need a lot of help. It would however open doors. Research is needed on this, otherwise, I know an artistic director and we could leverage her stuff if she is willing, and she was the one that knew and hung out with Andy Worhol and Candy Darling and many others , most of who are dead.  But working with her is more for anything if we push to dollars - for studio time.  And she has access to the legit stage off Broadway...

But it takes dollars to get studio time and that is a consideration.

The vision is simply this, to put in this case, me, out there as a transgender folk singer, setting the original music created to cinematography that supports it and drives it home.  It may take a long time to get there, but it can happen.  And that doesn't preclude others of us being in the loop here either and their stories told in music and images.

But to get off the ground, I want to do a simple original song with a mic and a guitar.  Just to get something started.  Just to see what could happen.  And  that is something that needs to come to fruition before anything moves forward on a larger scale.

If you want in on this or feel a burden to support it, PM me.  I am serious about it but have made no decisions yet.  I am looking very carefully at this.  Heart and eyes wide open.

I cannot see us grieve as we do.  I know I can do so much if unchained.

Many thanks dear ones.

Trinity

[Deleted]

Got some replies and some clarity, many thanks.

Also found out where they have a collaberation of trans/queer musicians that get together and play at times somewhere in Queens or Broolyn, I will be looking into this.

More later, will be a while.

[Deleted]

Well I've been poking around and putting up a lot of vids, and a heck of a lot of it is the heavies.

And I think thats the thing, most of what is going up is heavy. Maybe being trans is heavy too.

I almost regret posting the first you tube thing on transgender homelessness, I always was political when it comes to the performing arts. But I am not so sure that comes anywhere close to the needs of the community.

We see enough darkness. We need the songs of inspiration and hope. I like Namoni's work, that is what she does. Not much genderqueer out there as I said earlier, not that I found so far. The narrative remains the full transition narrative.

Anyway, we will see where this goes. Certainly my passion is back I went 12 hours straight on this stuff today. Time to lighten up.

So I appologize that some of this is dark and maybe destabilizing for those who are looking for the strength and hope to come out. But that strength and hope can and is found here on this forum and in little groups of people all over. I am just starting looking at it, my own transition physically has been long and supported here, now I am beginning to be aware of those around me that are closer than a computer screen or the phone. I am seeing how they live in real life. And its pretty amazing.

Blessings dear ones. I hope the homeless music vids dont take you down, nor the ones with the trigger warnings. But its a part of all this, and those of us that can help, should. For me, its reaching out through transgender AA. Another group will be started in Los Angeles soon, one of our members is going out there, it will be more than only New York that has this.

There is so much work to do and so many people that need love. And more than love.

One of our members is on the street. Its cold out there now. She has her own demons to fight, but it still is the way it is. The good news is she has a job, money coming in, and she is sober. And that we can help her with.

Good night.

Trinity