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Post by Deleted on Dec 28, 2014 22:59:37 GMT 8
I need to know how you beat fear. Not anxiety, fear that claws and makes us sick.
Thoughts please?
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Post by Deleted on Dec 28, 2014 23:37:43 GMT 8
It's all tied to changing one's attitude and willing oneself to overcome that which is illogically controlling one's thinking. You have to address each fear and dissect it mentally and determine if it is even the least bit logical in the first place, and then go after what part is legitimate and develop a plan for dealing with it if and when when it surfaces again. It's not hard and is a good exercise and is especially helpful for when you find yourself in mixed company in public places.
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Post by Laura J on Dec 29, 2014 4:10:23 GMT 8
I tend to withdraw, and find a way to disconnect from whatever is frightening.. Thats always when my most male qualities come out.. I used to get almost debilitating anxiety, and if I was in a room or group, I'd panic and do anything to get away from that environment, and to a more quiet place I had more control of..
I'm not as bad now, and since I discovered and am understanding my various gender personalities, I can more easily mix some qualities of my female way of thinking with my male, and I seem to be more ballanced and calm in dealing with extreme feelings like fear..
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Post by Deleted on Dec 29, 2014 8:30:36 GMT 8
I face it, break it down into different parts and go as slow as I need to to get past the block.
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Post by Deleted on Dec 30, 2014 21:32:08 GMT 8
I don't believe you can overcome fear, just face it and don't let it beat you. It all depends on what you are calling fear. True fear is a defense mechanism and then it promotes the fight or flight mechanism. Fear of the unknown is a little different. That is anxiety mixed with unsurity and dread and floods you mind with images of worst case scenarios. How you can beat that is with positive image reinforcement. Forcing negative images and thoughts out of your mind and replacing them with more positive ones. No one knows what each of our futures hold but there is one thing that is guaranteed in life and that is that there will be ups and downs. Good times and bad times. Happiness and sadness. There is no way around that and if you can just roll with it and enjoy the positives and not let the negatives bother you so much, then you are facing that fear of the unknown. But you have to experience the negatives just like the positives. Both have lessons contained within them.
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Post by Deleted on Dec 30, 2014 22:58:22 GMT 8
I don't believe you can overcome fear, just face it and don't let it beat you. It all depends on what you are calling fear. True fear is a defense mechanism and then it promotes the fight or flight mechanism. Fear of the unknown is a little different. That is anxiety mixed with unsurity and dread and floods you mind with images of worst case scenarios. How you can beat that is with positive image reinforcement. Forcing negative images and thoughts out of your mind and replacing them with more positive ones. No one knows what each of our futures hold but there is one thing that is guaranteed in life and that is that there will be ups and downs. Good times and bad times. Happiness and sadness. There is no way around that and if you can just roll with it and enjoy the positives and not let the negatives bother you so much, then you are facing that fear of the unknown. But you have to experience the negatives just like the positives. Both have lessons contained within them. Good post, I thinking we are dissecting fear rather nicely here!
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Post by Deleted on Dec 31, 2014 3:06:07 GMT 8
I don't believe you can overcome fear, just face it and don't let it beat you. It all depends on what you are calling fear. True fear is a defense mechanism and then it promotes the fight or flight mechanism. Fear of the unknown is a little different. That is anxiety mixed with unsurity and dread and floods you mind with images of worst case scenarios. How you can beat that is with positive image reinforcement. Forcing negative images and thoughts out of your mind and replacing them with more positive ones. No one knows what each of our futures hold but there is one thing that is guaranteed in life and that is that there will be ups and downs. Good times and bad times. Happiness and sadness. There is no way around that and if you can just roll with it and enjoy the positives and not let the negatives bother you so much, then you are facing that fear of the unknown. But you have to experience the negatives just like the positives. Both have lessons contained within them. Good post, I thinking we are dissecting fear rather nicely here! Thanks Shan. Physical fear like fear like fearing for your life is pretty cut and dried. The body floods with adrenaline and then you get that "fight or flight" instinct. That fear is really simple. The other kind like a mental fear in which the body is in no real immediate danger but fear of what may happen or things to come or just what life holds in store for you. It is more anxiety based and it can be kind of like a whirlpool. The more things, especially if you focus on the negative will go around and around in your mind and will suck you deeper and deeper. Ughh, I say the body is in no real danger but anxiety attacks, regardless of what others say can actually be a dangerous situation. Especially when the heart is racing and underlying conditions. Most people that I have known with anxiety and panic attacks had a real unhealthy fear of death. My heart starts racing, why waste it. Then it is fun time. See what I mean? I used to have heart palpitations, still do. Scared the shit out of me or used to. Doctors couldn't find any health reasons. Not AFIB nothing wrong with and my heart really healthy. Even saw a Cardiologist. But when I would have them, then the chest pains would come or seem to then it felt like it was hard to breathe. Then my mind would always hit the worst case scenario, "I'M GONNA' DIE." When I stopped giving a crap about dying, it was just my heart skipping a beat or two every now and then. No phantom chest pains, no fear of dying because I don't really care. But the difference between night and day. Fear does cause anxiety and anxiety can cause fear. Sorry Trinity. But fear and anxiety go hand in hand unless it is a life or death situation and that is more instinctual. If you can beat the anxiety, you may very well beat the fear or if you can conquer the fear the anxiety may go away. It would be helpful if you could give us a generalization of the fear you are wanting to beat. Physical, mental, fear of the unknown, uncertainty of the future either yours or the whole world's. Because depending, there is no one concept or exercise or thought process that can beat all fear. It really sounds stupid and probably not the answer Trinity was looking for and a big reason why I didn't say it before. It is rather simple. I don't care. Well I do care about others but I can't control other people, I can't control whether or not tomorrow comes. I can't change what happened yesterday, so I do own all my mistakes and have learned from them. All I can control is me, my own little space and the way I react to situations. I will help anyone to the best of my ability but we can all only do so much. I find it really hard to explain but I worry about "crossing bridges" when I get to them. I may not even get to another bridge I have to cross but if I do, I will figure out the best way then instead of worrying about it now. Does any of that make sense?
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Post by Anato on Dec 31, 2014 5:00:30 GMT 8
In my experience desensitization is the only thing that's ever helped me overcome fear or anxiety.
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Post by Deleted on Dec 31, 2014 5:42:34 GMT 8
Fear of a thing is often more harmful that the thing it's self. I get in a lot of situations where I feel a tight knot of fear in my tummy, actually I actively seek them out. You learn to gauge fear, when to let it go when it holds you back, when to keep hold of it when it's keeping you alive. Knowing the difference, that's the skill
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Post by Anato on Dec 31, 2014 12:17:29 GMT 8
A bitterly hard earned skill, but totally worth having.
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Post by EchelonHunt on Dec 31, 2014 12:40:25 GMT 8
I accept my fears and that seems to make them melt into nothing and lose the power they have over me.
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Post by Taka on Jan 22, 2015 19:42:56 GMT 8
face whatever it is you fear head on, and experience that it doesn't bite your head off. if it is an irrational fear. fear of bears is a healthy fear, so that's one you don't want to challenge.
some irrational fears are phobias. most phobias only are a problem in rather specific situations. if they are worse, desensitization is the only solution. it's more effective if you keep exposing yourself to it every chance you can possibly get. in a safe way of course. with a friend or therapist. once a week is ineffective. the body needs to experience the lack of real danger a whole lot of times before the brain starts deleting all those warning signs.
a more general anxiety, fear of the future and all that, is easiest conquered by accepting the fear. i'm scared. that doesn't mean it's dangerous. my fear is but a chemical imbalance. calm down. breathe. nobody is trying to kill me right now, i can do this. no need to panic.
a therapist might also be able to help. but that's more difficult, because the therapist can't be there with you 24/7. you have to do most of the work on your own, and the therapist can only give you advice. overcoming fear takes a whole lot of resolution from yourself.
i've done it on my own, so i know it's possible even without a therapist.
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Post by Ativan Prescribed on Jan 23, 2015 5:52:06 GMT 8
I started to have anxiety attacks six years ago when I woke up and had no idea who I was or why or even where I was. Then when I found out I was in the unit for the most violent in a state psyche hospital, I worried a lot about some of the others there. But even after I left there, the anxiety attacks kept up. They slowly went away, ativan was the drug of choice. Why I use it as my name, I needed on for a forum and I saw the bottle sitting there and laughed, I've used it since. But the anxiety also ran into panic at times, and weird thoughts went through my head. I finally figured out that they were parts of nightmares and those nightmares came from a time long passed. They turned into PTSD symptoms that are sometimes hard to take, but it is the oncoming of them that sets it all up to fall. I've hardly had to use any ativan anymore, I know what it is, so it's just a matter of telling myself no. I can't really explain how that works, at least not very well. In my head, I turn and face it and look at it for what it is, nothing really, just a weird response to something unrelated. Usually. And even if I know what it is, all the better to face it and see it for what it is as well, nothing really. But fear itself was always a good high for me. I took it way to far at times and off on an adventure that went all wrong, it became almost a daily thing, only a few days off here and there. But there were times that I had rounds passing by so close that I could not only hear them, but could feel the shock wave from them in my hair as they passed. Each time, the fear would hit right then and almost as fast, it felt good to know it missed me and I stayed calm. I had things to do. They were just simply shooting in what they thought was my direction and just got lucky by spraying rounds all over in the general direction. Most of the time they didn't even come close, but that worried me that they suddenly would and that fear was more than just a passing one. Ignoring it and concentrating on my job would bring me back down. I've had so many close calls from doing stupid things that I almost felt invincible. I actually like the rush, the moment that it is so close I have thought to myself 'I'm going to die', and that just pushed it away, why be afraid if your not going to live anyways? So lots and lots of really self induced moments of fear and I suppose a lot of moving past it was simple because I got used to it, to the point of craving it. I still do, and think about what I can do to get that back again. I have plans. So fear is addictive? The adrenaline is nice afterwards, but that initial gonna die fear is pretty strong emotionally and I've learned to look for it. It's the anxiety without apparent reason that is the damnedest. Nothing to look forward to or to be able to grab it to stop it. Panic attacks. But after six years of them, even they seem kinda fun in a gruesome sort of way. Irrational fears. Just face them and be happy they missed and I'm still alive? I think there is a big difference between being scared of something and fear. I'm scared of standing on the edge of even the edge of a one story roof. Higher up is even worse. But I can step back a few steps and it's gone, even if I am planning on going off that edge anyways. There is that moment of feeling like you are dying or dead, but it passes by faster than a blink. I like that feeling. Makes me feel alive. And that's just the point of it to me. Fear is something that makes everything count and you do what you have to do and move through it. Being scared is just being irrational about something and figuring it out to be able to stop it is usually pretty easy to do. Anxiety creates an atmosphere of fear, to the point of panic and that's like being scared. My mind now just shuts down and reboots in a manner and I see the panic for what it is, irrational. It dissipates, sometimes it takes a few minutes, maybe only a few seconds, but it melts away and there is that same feeling of it missed me. No big deal, it didn't kill me. But my general attitude is to push through it and it isn't as hard as it seems if you do it enough I suppose. Practiced for sure. So that's how I seem to deal with fears and being scared and having a panic attack. Shut off for a moment and come back and see it for what it is. Either a nuisance or fun. There doesn't seem to be much else or in between as well. Maybe I am as crazy as I've been told I am for the stupid things I do to feel alive. Not just living, but alive and looking at it all in a better way. Gonna die sooner or later, I'd hate for that to happen and it not at least being fun right up to and through that last split second. It's not a death wish, it's a wish to feel something more than simply living, it's to truly be alive and know it missed me again...
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