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Post by Deleted on Dec 9, 2014 10:24:12 GMT 8
I eat gator, its quite good prepared right. I like to eat something first so it cant eat me.
Seriously, where I live I can push the boundaries genderqueer without being a target, without eye shadow they usually dont notice anything but an old fart with a beard. I wear loose sweaters so the boobs dont show, but they are getting bigger.
Shaving is off the table, against medical advice as per my shrink. Too much collateral damage.
But I will tell you, today was dysphoria hell. And the disclosures based on guilt.... real food for thought there.
In a perfect world, I would be full transition and all girl, and I know I can pass.
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Post by Deleted on Dec 9, 2014 10:27:35 GMT 8
I eat gator, its quite good prepared right. I like to eat something first so it cant eat me. Seriously, where I live I can push the boundaries genderqueer without being a target, without eye shadow they usually dont notice anything but an old fart with a beard. I wear loose sweaters so the boobs dont show, but they are getting bigger. Shaving is off the table, against medical advice as per my shrink. Too much collateral damage. But I will tell you, today was dysphoria hell. And the disclosures based on guilt.... real food for thought there. In a perfect world, I would be full transition and all girl, and I know I can pass. You must live in Florida, have you any Patty or Mark met up yet?
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Post by Deleted on Dec 9, 2014 10:36:04 GMT 8
I eat gator, its quite good prepared right. I like to eat something first so it cant eat me. Seriously, where I live I can push the boundaries genderqueer without being a target, without eye shadow they usually dont notice anything but an old fart with a beard. I wear loose sweaters so the boobs dont show, but they are getting bigger. Shaving is off the table, against medical advice as per my shrink. Too much collateral damage. But I will tell you, today was dysphoria hell. And the disclosures based on guilt.... real food for thought there. In a perfect world, I would be full transition and all girl, and I know I can pass. You must live in Florida, have you any Patty or Mark met up yet? I'm off the grid love, as far as that answer goes. I am somewhere in the usa. And yes, Patty is just a beautiful, incredible woman. Seriously. I had a chance to sneak out one night.... not something my wife can handle, was a total one shot for now. She is still filled with fear of me transitioning. It is justified, I am full of fear too, Satinjoy is really, really strong, the ownership of the new body is complete and I can no longer fight it. Scares the living hell out of me. I stay to the forums. I can't go out, I need a few more years of assimilation as being a transsexual before those fear barriors break enough to meet people. I wont even go to a support group.
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Post by ThePhoenix on Dec 18, 2014 16:02:31 GMT 8
These topics of stealth vs open seem to come up a lot on trans* sites, but what seems to get missed is that these are not all or nothing propositions and they are not mutually exclusive. I am very open. But I am also very stealth. How's that for a contradiction? It's not contradictory at all.
I'm an activist, so I spend a lot of time being very open about being trans*, giving speeches, making proposals, etc., etc., etc. If there's one thing I get sick and tired of talking about, it's being trans*. So when I'm done doing the activist stuff, I go home. I deal with people in my day to day life. I don't talk about being trans*. If I do at all, I am simply a (very knowledgeable) ally of the community. And I pass well enough to pull off that trick of being an obvious expert on the subject without getting clocked.
So that's how I am open and stealth at the same time.
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Post by Deleted on Dec 18, 2014 20:04:40 GMT 8
Phoenix thank you for your contribution to trans and to us and to me.
Julie when we talk its two transwomen connecting. I go all girl fluid when chatting with another girl. However it shifts as we talk, you remain and always have remained quite female. I will never, ever forget your voice, the first I ever heard of trans, when I desperately called you in my first meltdown. First of many over trans...
So much better now....
To the point. How can I take any credit whatsoever for not being stealth. i go stealth birth gender when I have to, comfortably, hate hiding the nails though. At this stage, like Shantel, its take it or leave it or leave me alone and go deal with your issues and dont f with mine.
Its forced genderqueer presenting for me, not by real choice, its to mitigate collateral damage. I am learning now that I really am at core a nonbinary mtf. No dissassociation with the maleness, no false femaleness, and clearly female wired and now looking body. To my immense relief.
So, since I am gq, and out socially, what the heck. It is what it is.
But I will go stealth if risk is involved, if collateral damge would result, whatever. I hate collateral damage and will start a thread on this now.
So theres no great reason for me to be in your face trans, but I am by circumstance. What a trip that because my wife cant handle full presentation and my eldest kid would crack up from it, I have to be genderqueer, and as a direct result make a heck of a statement just by breathing that affects the trans community in a possitive way, and makes a difference, especially as I expose DES as causitive, leaving them speachless.
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