[ti]question[/ti]Dating Cis males is impossible for me?

[coco]

Okay so I wonder how other people encounter issues like this right. Here, as I just recently discovered my non-binary state (woman body but male inside - generalized) I still went for a date yesterday with a cis-male. Halfway in the pub, we finished the food, it started to get really busy and 3 women sat down next to us at the bar (we were sitting in a niche next to the bar). Suddenly my up until now quite relaxed male company started to show signs of nervousness and got fidgety and kept looking at those women, like really obvious (quick headturns). this lasted for about 20 minutes. When they left to their table further away to the front of the restaurant, he sort of calmed down again... So, of course I noticed this and now, I think I defo should have mentioned this to him! I should have said: " if you want, go over and talk to her! as you seem to like what you see?" I mean, I could do this, in a nice way, like a friend, and not like a date, if this makes sense? And I regret I wore a short dress to show off my legs and it was tight on top and not too much make-up though. Anyway, This AGAIN proved the state I find myself in?? Also I am soo sensitive to things like this. We had fun together but nothing happened in the physical sense, just a tiny kiss at the end, but now I am not sure if I want to meet up again, and how shall I continue. I might tell him the truth about me and mention the women situation to him and also he is quite tiny so we would not be a really good match anyway (I mean he is about half my size lol) I don't mind if the man is smaller, but yeh. If we meet up, then just as friends and me wearing my Jeans and T-shirt lol, and I can help him become more confident so he can get a pretty little woman for himself? Something like that. And I might better see what is in store for me next, but no more cis-males? I can hardly believe this haha story of my life. Thank you for reading, and what are your thoughts on this? Enjoy the dayXX

[Trinity]

Apr 19, 2019 13:54:39 GMT 8 coco said:

Okay so I wonder how other people encounter issues like this right. Here, as I just recently discovered my non-binary state (woman body but male inside - generalized) I still went for a date yesterday with a cis-male. Halfway in the pub, we finished the food, it started to get really busy and 3 women sat down next to us at the bar (we were sitting in a niche next to the bar). Suddenly my up until now quite relaxed male company started to show signs of nervousness and got fidgety and kept looking at those women, like really obvious (quick headturns). this lasted for about 20 minutes. When they left to their table further away to the front of the restaurant, he sort of calmed down again... So, of course I noticed this and now, I think I defo should have mentioned this to him! I should have said: " if you want, go over and talk to her! as you seem to like what you see?" I mean, I could do this, in a nice way, like a friend, and not like a date, if this makes sense? And I regret I wore a short dress to show off my legs and it was tight on top and not too much make-up though. Anyway, This AGAIN proved the state I find myself in?? Also I am soo sensitive to things like this. We had fun together but nothing happened in the physical sense, just a tiny kiss at the end, but now I am not sure if I want to meet up again, and how shall I continue. I might tell him the truth about me and mention the women situation to him and also he is quite tiny so we would not be a really good match anyway (I mean he is about half my size lol) I don't mind if the man is smaller, but yeh. If we meet up, then just as friends and me wearing my Jeans and T-shirt lol, and I can help him become more confident so he can get a pretty little woman for himself? Something like that. And I might better see what is in store for me next, but no more cis-males? I can hardly believe this haha story of my life. Thank you for reading, and what are your thoughts on this? Enjoy the dayXX

As an amab i have a diff take on it.  As a preop or no op transperson with full transition, unless they knowtwhat i am, its a no go.

Since im married to a cis female ots not going to happen.
Itran or nb men are safer...for the long future or never.

Married for life here.

[coco]

Trinity Good you stick to your partner, respect. And that your partner accepts you the way you are, awesome. And you mean, a no-go in terms of hopeing to have future with cis-male after this discovery? Yes, I feel that way. Not sure if I am sad about it. I don't know what I will do, take something, or trans partly maybe? I'm not at that point yet tbh. I've always felt a strange attraction to gay men though. Even when at the hairdressers, when a gay man is assigned to me, I chat away so naturally, easier than with most women for instance. thank you for your input

[Trinity]

Apr 20, 2019 11:01:00 GMT 8 coco said:

Trinity Good you stick to your partner, respect. And that your partner accepts you the way you are, awesome. And you mean, a no-go in terms of hopeing to have future with cis-male after this discovery? Yes, I feel that way. Not sure if I am sad about it. I don't know what I will do, take something, or trans partly maybe? I'm not at that point yet tbh. I've always felt a strange attraction to gay men though. Even when at the hairdressers, when a gay man is assigned to me, I chat away so naturally, easier than with most women for instance. thank you for your input

I find trans men to be very attractive, mb or binary.  Have to be careful around them.

[Ativan Prescribed]

Been there done that, no regrets, but then I wasn't tied to anyone or anything really.
Having yourself in a position to basically do the things you want allows for a lot of things.
But a good relationship is much more important.
I've had a couple and even they ended in abrupt ways, as if they never happened.
Those are the regrets that happened, but life pivots on moments in time, be ready for it.

[oldbutwise]

I know this is old but I don't see why coco can't date cis-men. I've been talking with a woman online and we're getting realy to meet in person. I plan on telling her before that. I figure if she can't accept me as I am then she really isn't the right woman for me. Personally I enjoy being the man in our relationship, I don't want to be the woman in our relationship, and I don't want to be her girlfriend ever, not even for 5 minutes once a year. It's just that I have thoughts and feelings that most cis-men don't have. I've seriously tried to imagine how my life would have been different if I was born a girl, which has made me pay attention to what women say they go through. It makes me more sensitive towards that. I don't know what kind of relationship coco is looking for but if it's something similar then I say go for it.