Hello all! New and unsure.

[Kechara]

Hello everybody! In the last few days, I've started to wonder if I might be non-binary, or non-binary woman. I was AFAB, and I've never felt like that was necessarily wrong, but there were several times that I wished I wasn't a girl, so I could do things that weren't "for girls". Things like shaving my head, or going with my brother to his Boy Scout activities (Pinewood derby, in particular, I was so jealous about). I don't think I've had any dysphoria, per se, although I have at times wish I didn't have a chest, because it's just annoying. Last year, I had bought a binder to wear for a cosplay, and I found it as, or more comfortable, than a bra. I started to look for reasons to wear it, although I can't much because I have 8-9 hour work shifts, and a thirty minute commute.

Growing up, I was frequently mistaken for a boy, but that never bothered me. In fact, I usually found it amusing. Even now, when I wear my binder, I look forward to the times people refer to me as "sir." But I don't know if that's because it feels like it fits better than "ma'am" or because at some level, I feel like I'm subtly tricking people, or if it's something else entirely that I haven't figured out yet. 

I don't really know much about the LGBTQ+ community as a whole. I grew up in the south, in a religious family, a religion that "doesn't condone" such things, and went to a small charter school. Between all of that, and being incredibly shy, I simply wasn't exposed to the community until the last five years or so. And I didn't even start trying to learn much until the last two years. I still frequently screw up things like pronouns and assuming in general, but I'm trying. I almost feel like I need to be better about that before I am "allowed" to try to fit in the community.

I don't know if non-binary (or non-binary woman) is right for me. I have never felt like I was a boy, but I don't know what being a boy should feel like. I think I like the idea of not being a gender, but rather being a person that likes to wear dresses sometimes. I don't know if I'd like to use they/them pronouns, and I may stick with she/her.

I hope you won't mind me hanging around while I work at figuring myself out.

[Trinity]

Nov 13, 2018 20:30:36 GMT 8 Kechara said:

Hello everybody! In the last few days, I've started to wonder if I might be non-binary, or non-binary woman. I was AFAB, and I've never felt like that was necessarily wrong, but there were several times that I wished I wasn't a girl, so I could do things that weren't "for girls". Things like shaving my head, or going with my brother to his Boy Scout activities (Pinewood derby, in particular, I was so jealous about). I don't think I've had any dysphoria, per se, although I have at times wish I didn't have a chest, because it's just annoying. Last year, I had bought a binder to wear for a cosplay, and I found it as, or more comfortable, than a bra. I started to look for reasons to wear it, although I can't much because I have 8-9 hour work shifts, and a thirty minute commute.

Growing up, I was frequently mistaken for a boy, but that never bothered me. In fact, I usually found it amusing. Even now, when I wear my binder, I look forward to the times people refer to me as "sir." But I don't know if that's because it feels like it fits better than "ma'am" or because at some level, I feel like I'm subtly tricking people, or if it's something else entirely that I haven't figured out yet. 

I don't really know much about the LGBTQ+ community as a whole. I grew up in the south, in a religious family, a religion that "doesn't condone" such things, and went to a small charter school. Between all of that, and being incredibly shy, I simply wasn't exposed to the community until the last five years or so. And I didn't even start trying to learn much until the last two years. I still frequently screw up things like pronouns and assuming in general, but I'm trying. I almost feel like I need to be better about that before I am "allowed" to try to fit in the community.

I don't know if non-binary (or non-binary woman) is right for me. I have never felt like I was a boy, but I don't know what being a boy should feel like. I think I like the idea of not being a gender, but rather being a person that likes to wear dresses sometimes. I don't know if I'd like to use they/them pronouns, and I may stick with she/her.

I hope you won't mind me hanging around while I work at figuring myself out.

Enjoy it and welcome!

[Becky]

Nov 13, 2018 20:30:36 GMT 8 Kechara said:

Hello everybody! In the last few days, I've started to wonder if I might be non-binary, or non-binary woman. I was AFAB, and I've never felt like that was necessarily wrong, but there were several times that I wished I wasn't a girl, so I could do things that weren't "for girls". Things like shaving my head, or going with my brother to his Boy Scout activities (Pinewood derby, in particular, I was so jealous about). I don't think I've had any dysphoria, per se, although I have at times wish I didn't have a chest, because it's just annoying. Last year, I had bought a binder to wear for a cosplay, and I found it as, or more comfortable, than a bra. I started to look for reasons to wear it, although I can't much because I have 8-9 hour work shifts, and a thirty minute commute.

Growing up, I was frequently mistaken for a boy, but that never bothered me. In fact, I usually found it amusing. Even now, when I wear my binder, I look forward to the times people refer to me as "sir." But I don't know if that's because it feels like it fits better than "ma'am" or because at some level, I feel like I'm subtly tricking people, or if it's something else entirely that I haven't figured out yet. 

I don't really know much about the LGBTQ+ community as a whole. I grew up in the south, in a religious family, a religion that "doesn't condone" such things, and went to a small charter school. Between all of that, and being incredibly shy, I simply wasn't exposed to the community until the last five years or so. And I didn't even start trying to learn much until the last two years. I still frequently screw up things like pronouns and assuming in general, but I'm trying. I almost feel like I need to be better about that before I am "allowed" to try to fit in the community.

I don't know if non-binary (or non-binary woman) is right for me. I have never felt like I was a boy, but I don't know what being a boy should feel like. I think I like the idea of not being a gender, but rather being a person that likes to wear dresses sometimes. I don't know if I'd like to use they/them pronouns, and I may stick with she/her.

I hope you won't mind me hanging around while I work at figuring myself out.

Welcome to the forum!  Please make yourself at home.  There are a lot of supportive folks here.

[peanut]

Nov 13, 2018 20:30:36 GMT 8 Kechara said:

Hello everybody! In the last few days, I've started to wonder if I might be non-binary, or non-binary woman. I was AFAB, and I've never felt like that was necessarily wrong, but there were several times that I wished I wasn't a girl, so I could do things that weren't "for girls". Things like shaving my head, or going with my brother to his Boy Scout activities (Pinewood derby, in particular, I was so jealous about). I don't think I've had any dysphoria, per se, although I have at times wish I didn't have a chest, because it's just annoying. Last year, I had bought a binder to wear for a cosplay, and I found it as, or more comfortable, than a bra. I started to look for reasons to wear it, although I can't much because I have 8-9 hour work shifts, and a thirty minute commute.

Growing up, I was frequently mistaken for a boy, but that never bothered me. In fact, I usually found it amusing. Even now, when I wear my binder, I look forward to the times people refer to me as "sir." But I don't know if that's because it feels like it fits better than "ma'am" or because at some level, I feel like I'm subtly tricking people, or if it's something else entirely that I haven't figured out yet. 

I don't really know much about the LGBTQ+ community as a whole. I grew up in the south, in a religious family, a religion that "doesn't condone" such things, and went to a small charter school. Between all of that, and being incredibly shy, I simply wasn't exposed to the community until the last five years or so. And I didn't even start trying to learn much until the last two years. I still frequently screw up things like pronouns and assuming in general, but I'm trying. I almost feel like I need to be better about that before I am "allowed" to try to fit in the community.

I don't know if non-binary (or non-binary woman) is right for me. I have never felt like I was a boy, but I don't know what being a boy should feel like. I think I like the idea of not being a gender, but rather being a person that likes to wear dresses sometimes. I don't know if I'd like to use they/them pronouns, and I may stick with she/her.

I hope you won't mind me hanging around while I work at figuring myself out.

I'm still trying to work out and understand myself too. You are "allowed" in the community, of course, everyone has an adjustment period. If anything being a part of the community should make your adjustment easier. I can't get pronouns right myself and trying to get out of the habit of assuming gender is so difficult because it's so ingrained in you.

And hey, a fellow cosplayer!

I listened to how dysphoria is needed to be trans so many times but even though I was beginning to believe it because there weren't enough voices telling me otherwise but I realised it just doesn't make sense to me. I think if being male/androgynous/non-binary anything outside of "female" makes you more comfortable or feeling good about yourself then that's a sign. Working out what being outside of the binary means is something you are going to have to create your own rules for because that is something that is unique to everyone.

[Ativan Prescribed]

Nov 13, 2018 20:30:36 GMT 8 Kechara said:

I hope you won't mind me hanging around while I work at figuring myself out.

It's what we are all doing...(and helping when we can)