[ti]music[/ti]Hello from not such a noob
May 22, 2017 5:44:01 GMT 8
EchelonHunt, Taka, and 2 more like this
Post by Aadya on May 22, 2017 5:44:01 GMT 8
Hello folks!!
Ain't life bizarre, I am just never sure what the firing neurons in my head are going to come up with next.
I transitioned around 10 years ago so now I am living my life as a female - superb!! and what a relief it is compared to my prior life which is just a distant nightmare. Although my life since transitioning has been a rollercoaster I probably wouldn't change much, so many people have told me to write a book - probably cos they have finally become fed up with the drama in my life.
Anyway, to keep my intro brief. This week I finally admitted that I am non-binary - or some variant, if that is possible. Considering everything I have been through to date, it isn't a huge issue but it lays to rest something that I have been very uncomfortable with since I transitioned. Don't get me wrong, my whole being still aches and craves to have been born female and I know for certain that I was never male.
However, inside there is something that just doesn't click. I have never been able to say that 'I am female'. Why? Is it part of the way that I was born? Is it because I grew up male and my female sense of identity was distorted and destroyed? Who knows? There is nothing to analyse.I just know that inside, I can't declare myself as female - obviously the male aspect really never existed - so I have no internal sense of gender.
This is good news for me. It means I can be me, in whatever form that takes. My presentation to the outside world isn't as important as knowing who I am and being honest with myself. Transitioning was never about the acceptance of other people but about accepting myself....and somehow I feel I have finally crossed the finish line.
I look forward to reading the posts on the forum to help settle myself into this change to my personal identity.
Thanks for reading xox
Ain't life bizarre, I am just never sure what the firing neurons in my head are going to come up with next.
I transitioned around 10 years ago so now I am living my life as a female - superb!! and what a relief it is compared to my prior life which is just a distant nightmare. Although my life since transitioning has been a rollercoaster I probably wouldn't change much, so many people have told me to write a book - probably cos they have finally become fed up with the drama in my life.
Anyway, to keep my intro brief. This week I finally admitted that I am non-binary - or some variant, if that is possible. Considering everything I have been through to date, it isn't a huge issue but it lays to rest something that I have been very uncomfortable with since I transitioned. Don't get me wrong, my whole being still aches and craves to have been born female and I know for certain that I was never male.
However, inside there is something that just doesn't click. I have never been able to say that 'I am female'. Why? Is it part of the way that I was born? Is it because I grew up male and my female sense of identity was distorted and destroyed? Who knows? There is nothing to analyse.I just know that inside, I can't declare myself as female - obviously the male aspect really never existed - so I have no internal sense of gender.
This is good news for me. It means I can be me, in whatever form that takes. My presentation to the outside world isn't as important as knowing who I am and being honest with myself. Transitioning was never about the acceptance of other people but about accepting myself....and somehow I feel I have finally crossed the finish line.
I look forward to reading the posts on the forum to help settle myself into this change to my personal identity.
Thanks for reading xox
