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Post by Deleted on Dec 24, 2014 12:06:28 GMT 8
I am good, cleared the air, doing fine and seem to be ok. Was a shock for her to find out I was ts and already transitioned hormonally. She just getting her head around it, and I am too sensitive, it doesn't take much. Typical abused trans scenario, sooner or later the nails come out. Oh hon. You can only do so much. It's all about meeting in the middle. Give her time. It does take time and with the younger ones they are more quick o accept than the older ones. 1 or 2 years make a hell of a lot of difference. Disclaimer: I know nothing about children because I can't have them as a male or female so I am just assuming. Maybe I shouldn't even give advice here because I just don't know.
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Post by Deleted on Jan 3, 2015 3:15:43 GMT 8
The dynamics are interesting. As stated in another thread, I blew up over the suicides and publically said I was transgender. Eyeliner, nails, rings the works.
Some curious folks, some silent, the boss hover around front out of her office. Unusual.
A warehouse worker sneaks a peak, makes small talk, is glancing at nails.
Whispers, obvious pins and needles, changes in dynamics. Changes in interpersonal relationships, instant shifts.
A dance to watch, they dance with my core, I lead them.
Two years of therapy, 30 of AA, put to the test. To stand up for truth, or cave in to adversity and bigotry.
How deep does the rabbit hole run.
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Post by Deleted on Jan 3, 2015 4:49:18 GMT 8
Exciting time for you Trinity Take it easy on yourselve, let me know if you have questions on coming out at work This is something I went through also four years ago coming out as transgender and again last year switching to fulltime female. You said you blew up, how did it go telling there? Was it a happy thing telling them, was it sad, a silent or strong voice, or did you drop a t-bomb on them? You see, im interested in the dynamics you experience and the best way to handle for you. exciting! Since I was angry about the suicides, it was very strong. Basically an ultimatum, knew that said I won't tolerate bigotry and don't screw with me for being .real. Sometimes respect can be demanded and gotten. So be it.
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Post by Deleted on Jan 3, 2015 5:45:26 GMT 8
The home front knows what I generally wear but does not know I am out. They don't need to.
Nobody in the office will dare challenge. The ones that did got called sweetheart by me, gently, and are now alloys.
Two that went behind my back chose to talk to Cynthia and she very effectively made them take a look at themselves.
Anyone else, I will handle depending on tone. There is some open disdain being shown, but mostly business as usual.
If a customer looks confused I offer them a cup of coffee and they just relax.
Not bad for a commercial construction subcontractor house.
I will be fine. The only one that can harm knows I am DES and has nothing to say, they might, but if they do they lose big and appear to be assholes.
At the moment it works, and since I am visible now to customers while still not out, it carries a strong message.
Blessings
Trinity
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Post by Laura J on Jan 3, 2015 8:33:31 GMT 8
It sounds like you're answering your own topic about fighting this "Trans War", and right now you're in the heat of battle. The battle for hearts and minds of others, as well as your own freedom..
I'm not experienced in transitioning, so I won't add anything, except give my total support in all you're going through, same as anyone else here..
Please be careful, and give it to God, you'll feel peace with the right way to go.. Remember that in our weakness, is his strength, and much of these things are as much a spiritual battle as anything else.. Please don't neglect that. I just say these things between you and I, because I know we believe similarly.
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Post by Deleted on Jan 16, 2015 7:31:46 GMT 8
Well.
My emotional response to this is always about twenty-four hours delayed and I inject tonight. I hope it numbs me out.
I got written up here at work for talking about trans during company hours.
It is my first time being written up in 32 years of nontheatrical work. 45 if we count in professional theater.
They said I was talking to people that didn't want to hear it and it was disruptive.
Since that was with friends or by innuendo during conversations, then they were eavesdropping.
But I am forbidden to speak of trans at work.
I am also allowed to be me and to present as I wish including fully presenting.
I need to grow up right now and get coldblooded business pragmatic.
Iiwill shut up, I will stay me, and just be.
Insecurity and childish excitement were driving my discussions as I came out on the job.
Time to get smart.
Their letter was smart too.
Time to watch my back.
The win? I made some kind of impression, and I still can be me.
Pragmatically, I may have done just fine.
They don't ever give raises anyway, so it's just a letter.
So be it.
Trinity
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Post by Deleted on Jan 16, 2015 8:31:40 GMT 8
Quick afterthought. I get aa meetings in the am, time for shrink, bloods, endo. I have no cause yo complain.
I need to grow up.
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Post by Deleted on Jan 16, 2015 21:57:01 GMT 8
Read this, learn from it. It contains my real name, ignore that please, totally, do not release it to anybody. warning letter.pdf (386.89 KB) Besides, I don't like that name it is no longer who I am.
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Post by Deleted on Jan 17, 2015 1:21:49 GMT 8
I get too much from the job to fight back. Some they wrote up are flat out lies.
I just wonder if I should ever address the hate speech I hear from coworkers.
And oddly they had a meeting I did not knows about today for business, with me in it, and I realized that the only thing male about me is that beard. Everything else is female, with them in the room around the conference room, it was obvious.
Since I have no presentation limitations, I just will remain me. And get the jobs done.
Didn't realize how far I actually have transitioned.
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Post by Deleted on Jan 17, 2015 2:57:03 GMT 8
Read this, learn from it. It contains my real name, ignore that please, totally, do not release it to anybody. Besides, I don't like that name it is no longer who I am. Looks like you're going to have to cool your jets at work or face the possibility of becoming unemployed. Sorry this is happening, but it would seem that it's time to keep anything personal to yourself and put some space between you and the other worker bees for your own sake.
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Post by Deleted on Jan 17, 2015 3:33:18 GMT 8
Read this, learn from it. It contains my real name, ignore that please, totally, do not release it to anybody. Besides, I don't like that name it is no longer who I am. Looks like you're going to have to cool your jets at work or face the possibility of becoming unemployed. Sorry this is happening, but it would seem that it's time to keep anything personal to yourself and put some space between you and the other worker bees for your own sake. Agreed. Jets cooling, brain working. To the blind...
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Post by Deleted on Jan 17, 2015 3:44:58 GMT 8
Sometimes it's tough being all we want to be 24/7 but employers call the shots up until you have a clear bullet proof case of discrimination against you, though I've seen people let go just because they wanted to be rid of someone they thought was disruptive in the workplace and to sidestep discrimination allegations they use an alternative reason. Be careful, in the final analysis they have all the clout and you can't afford to lose your income. ((Hugs))
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Post by Deleted on Jan 17, 2015 5:30:19 GMT 8
Sometimes it's tough being all we want to be 24/7 but employers call the shots up until you have a clear bullet proof case of discrimination against you, though I've seen people let go just because they wanted to be rid of someone they thought was disruptive in the workplace and to sidestep discrimination allegations they use an alternative reason. Be careful, in the final analysis they have all the clout and you can't afford to lose your income. ((Hugs)) I see the Lord's preserving hand. I know what works and what does not, at home, in office. They are similar. It's falling into place, it's up to me to accept it, or blow it. Blessings Trinity Satinjoy
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Post by Deleted on Jan 17, 2015 6:26:21 GMT 8
Sometimes it's tough being all we want to be 24/7 but employers call the shots up until you have a clear bullet proof case of discrimination against you, though I've seen people let go just because they wanted to be rid of someone they thought was disruptive in the workplace and to sidestep discrimination allegations they use an alternative reason. Be careful, in the final analysis they have all the clout and you can't afford to lose your income. ((Hugs)) I see the Lord's preserving hand. I know what works and what does not, at home, in office. They are similar. It's falling into place, it's up to me to accept it, or blow it. Blessings Trinity Satinjoy Just being an older supportive person, not trying to be preachy!
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Post by Deleted on Jan 17, 2015 7:25:09 GMT 8
I got preachy, I do that.
I just am grateful and amazed at how so much came together.
I actually feel at peace with everything now.
That is incredible for me.
Blessings my dears
Trinity
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