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Post by Emily on Feb 26, 2015 2:00:47 GMT 8
Nope, we were training for reenactment-jousting disciplines - I know that several from our group ended up with participating in local and regional Medieval-themed events, but in my case ""sh*t hit the fan" and suddenly nothing of that seemed important anymore. You sure don't look anything like your former self, the change in appearance is amazing! Thank You, Shan and Jamie My mother is of different opinion though. It is funny how much people are willing to find simple excuses like - "omg, You have changed so much... it must be hair, I guess". But those are people who are expecting to see and meet my former self and of course there are facial traits which remain unchanged if You look closely enough. When people dont really expect to meet me, they usually just pass me by on the street. On a funny note, today I commuted to work, dressed in female active-wear jacket and nobody said a thing. Another co-worker, I bumped into, just looked at me and asked if I did not get too cold while wearing that... A couple of guys looked at me in the shopping mall but I have no idea what they were thinking. It felt almost like kinda going full-time without making any announcements. Well, knowing me, I could pretty much do that thing, cause that would save me of lots of explanations . Active outfit
Funny thing, apparently I have M size for female clothing and could squeeze into S if wished (but dont really see that necessary). I thought it should L, but even M in some parts seems a bit too large. I cant really explain that, especially since I consider myself overweight for my height/weight group.
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Post by Deleted on Feb 26, 2015 4:00:39 GMT 8
You sure don't look anything like your former self, the change in appearance is amazing! Thank You, Shan and Jamie My mother is of different opinion though. It is funny how much people are willing to find simple excuses like - "omg, You have changed so much... it must be hair, I guess". But those are people who are expecting to see and meet my former self and of course there are facial traits which remain unchanged if You look closely enough. When people dont really expect to meet me, they usually just pass me by on the street. On a funny note, today I commuted to work, dressed in female active-wear jacket and nobody said a thing. Another co-worker, I bumped into, just looked at me and asked if I did not get too cold while wearing that... A couple of guys looked at me in the shopping mall but I have no idea what they were thinking. It felt almost like kinda going full-time without making any announcements. Well, knowing me, I could pretty much do that thing, cause that would save me of lots of explanations . Active outfit
Funny thing, apparently I have M size for female clothing and could squeeze into S if wished (but dont really see that necessary). I thought it should L, but even M in some parts seems a bit too large. I cant really explain that, especially since I consider myself overweight for my height/weight group. I like that outfit, it works just fine!
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Post by Deleted on Feb 26, 2015 5:28:25 GMT 8
Yup.
Lookin good Emily.
Trinity
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Emily
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Post by Emily on Feb 26, 2015 5:59:12 GMT 8
Oh, thank You, everyone . It's just... I am getting suspicion that I dont really look like I could kick some ass anymore. Or do I?
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Post by Deleted on Feb 26, 2015 6:05:33 GMT 8
Oh, thank You, everyone . It's just... I am getting suspicion that I dont really look like I could kick some ass anymore. Or do I? they will be looking at yours dear
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Emily
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Post by Emily on Feb 26, 2015 6:07:55 GMT 8
Oh, thank You, everyone . It's just... I am getting suspicion that I dont really look like I could kick some ass anymore. Or do I? they will be looking at yours dear Ah... You know, that was not the answer I wanted to hear...
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Post by Deleted on Feb 26, 2015 6:55:53 GMT 8
they will be looking at yours dear Ah... You know, that was not the answer I wanted to hear... Yeah I don't know you that well....
Please take it as a compliment, it is meant to be one.
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Post by Deleted on Feb 26, 2015 9:45:16 GMT 8
I looked again..it was an honest response.
There was a time when as a pretty boy actor I got accosted on the street, again. I'd already gone through seven muggings, one which was violent.
I snapped, was ready to run an umbrella up their ass. They went after another target.
Yes dear, I am sure you can still kick ass, whether you look great, as you do, or go stealth as a porcupine or a wolf.
Sorry if I offended or continue to do so.
But I already have my foot in my mouth and that leaves only one place left on me where you could stick yours....
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Post by Emily on Feb 26, 2015 15:42:48 GMT 8
I am sorry to hear about Your past experiences, but You won on that day because You were stronger than them. No offense taken, of course . It's, just, You brought another perspective into this - something which I knew deep down there, but could not force myself to accept it. All my life I build that outer image of someone not to be messed with or not even to be looked at (there were times when I thought that getting a big nasty scar accross my face would add +10 to my masculinity....). And now, I must come to terms with the inevitable - that someone might be checking out my ass... . A small update. A couple of hours later after I posted the text above, I caught myself checking out one of male co-workers while chatting with him. So, I guess, if I am doing this sort of thing (well, I was not looking at his ass but I was checking him out for being a guy not a human being), then I should be fine when other people are doing the same to me.
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Post by Deleted on Feb 26, 2015 19:20:00 GMT 8
Now I am amused....hah!
Yeah I remember when a hot one walked in the office, a customer, and the girl behind me got turned on. So I looked and saw what she had all ready seen.
It gets interesting, have fun with it...I was always bi, but now, ts, is a different experience.
Wish I could act on it. Can't, married to a girl.
It's exciting Emily. And you can stay a bad ass too, look at Ativan.
And they are eyecandy. Speaking of a nice ass.
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Post by Taka on Feb 27, 2015 1:00:21 GMT 8
you'll have to go with "cute things kill", emily. some really do, and i wouldn't be too surprised if you did..
you aren't overweight at all. don't go getting any funny ideas with a body like that.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 14, 2015 2:08:37 GMT 8
Oh, thank You, everyone . It's just... I am getting suspicion that I dont really look like I could kick some ass anymore. Or do I? Not really. Is that what yu are going for is to kick ass and take names later? If so maybe martial arts would be your thing but you should know womnen don't really fight with thier fist anyway. Our most dangerous weopon is our tounges and that is shaprer than any knife you could ever use. ( )
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Post by Ativan Prescribed on Mar 14, 2015 10:10:13 GMT 8
Is it about looking like you could kick some ass, or is it about being able to? Finding a sparring partner is always helpful. Kick boxing will keep most people in good enough shape. I'll take martial arts over fricken yoga any day. As far as weapons go, almost everything can be used as a weapon in a fight, lol. I still like the Three Stooges, 'Pick two fingers' method. Hold your left hand out and ask them, when they look at your left hand, roundhouse them with a right and call it a day.
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Emily
Junior Member
Posts: 71
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Jun 11, 2015 3:21:46 GMT 8
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Post by Emily on Mar 28, 2015 22:07:26 GMT 8
Hey guys, it has been awhile and I logged in to see all of Your positive and flattering (way too much, IMHO...) comments. I am still frustrated but not amused anymore. Here's why - it is going to be a bit long, so either grab some patience or switch to another topic . To answer some of above comments, the shopping issue is slowly being solved - I noticed that nobody pays attention to me when I am shopping in female section, nobody raises eyebrows when I am checking stuff out, so maybe people just dont care. I also noticed that a lot of things they are selling are almost identical for men and women, just maybe some tiny details in cut and shape... I have been coming to office dressed in entirely female outfit, and people still do not notice... Yesterday I spoke with one of my co-workers from neighbour department - I picked her, because she has great personality and we do interact a lot, so she seemed the most appropriate one. To keep it short, she was very accepting and curious; she asked for how long I knew and said that this is quite a step and adventure to undertake. Yet, she also said that when she speaks to me, she is seeing a guy... Which was kinda frustrating to hear, but I was wondering if that was so because she knew that she was supposed to see a guy? Anyway, that thought and realisation kept nagging for the rest of day. And in the evening I experienced my first serious incident of harassment, but not for being a transgender, but for being seen or perceived as woman. I was heading home with my daughter (she spends weekends with me) and because of unpredictable weather I left my bike at home and used public transportation. Our favourite seats were taken, so we sat down in the seat, specifically designated for parents with children and elderly people. There are three seats and the issue is, they are facing each other. On the next station, a guy in his thirties came and plumped down in front of us, still talking on his cell, and I could sense quite a strong and unpleasant smell of booze. Once he finished, he turned attention to us and started flirting with kiddo, who was on my knees. Kiddo obviously did not like him, so I hugged her as tightly as I could and gave him the meanest and threatening stare I could (like, stop this or...). The bastard just grinned at us and started waiving his hand - as it was dangerously close to child, I lightly but firmly slapped it away. Still, he kept muttering "miss" and I realised that he was actually addressing me - because he started asking "miss, how old is she?", "miss, why are You wearing gloves inside?", "Your daughter does not speak Russian, miss? oh, your are such imbeciles - but soon it is going to change and everyone will be speaking Russian...", "You know, You are bad mother because You are not letting Your daughter to communicate with other people. You hear me, miss? Did I make myself clear?" Initially, I was shocked - mostly because he called me "miss" and my first impulse was to drop down as much as I could and say "Just f..ck off, dude". But I could not predict his reaction and having to keep my child safe was a priority, so I just shut ourselves out and was counting remaining stations... I was thinking about answering some of his questions, but was afraid that my voice might raise suspicions and situation might become even more unpredictable... I really hate public transportation and public places for this - outside, I would have simply picked up kiddo and walked away. And maced anyone who would try to follow. The situation ended even more unpredictable - a woman suddenly spoke up, telling him to stop traumatising little child and harassing young woman... He tried to play smartass and be very rude with her, and next moment, two really huge guys dragged him out of his place and threw him out on the next stop - I just could not believe my eyes. And the worst thing was, I actually felt quilty - because had I spoken to him, maybe that situation would have ended differently (probably with him being maced in his face, but... whatever). I had many confrontations, including violent ones (but always preferred to resolve conflicts without violence) as a guy and there was always some sort of afterfeeling, when body was recovering from adrenaline and stress, but this situation made me feel bad, but in a different way... And moreover this unpleasant experience totally contradicted conclusions which I still had from conversation with my co-worker, which was even more frustrating.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 28, 2015 23:36:46 GMT 8
What an interesting series of events! I would agree with you about the female co-worker, she has known you as male and so her brain is programed to accept and see you as male. People who know us prior go through an internally programmed sense of denial concerning things that are clearly and evidently different with us and the brain intentionally blots out the new information as something that should be disregarded. I've seen this time and again. For example, my mail lady is an attractive young woman who I have been flirting with for a long time, she's a conservative and has bigoted attitudes and yet when I meet her at the mailbox and I am looking obviously way more female than male, it does not register with her and she continues on in her flirty chatty manner because her brain is still telling her that this is that nice older gentleman who thinks she's so cute.
The experience on the public transport that you and your daughter had wasn't so bad, you acted perfectly as any young mother would, you needn't harbor any guilt feelings over it as it was and extremely validating event confirmed even more so by the women's comments and the other men's intervention. Kudos!
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